Uncle Of The Bride Speech

Giving a wedding speech can be daunting at the best of times, especially when in unusual circumstances, but it doesn’t need to be.

If the bride has asked you to deliver a speech at her wedding, it’s because she feels you are one of the people who know and love her best, and we all know that she is the boss! So here are some of our top tips to help you to create the perfect speech for her, and all the wedding guests.

Father of the Bride Speech

If The Bride's Father Has Passed Away

It may be that you’ve been asked to give the speech because the bride’s father has passed away, your brother maybe. This makes your speech so much more important, and essential to get right.

Be aware that this is likely to be a very emotional moment in the day. All the guests and your niece will expect you to talk about her dad but remember this isn’t the time to do a eulogy.

Your speech should focus on the bride herself (as a traditional father of the bride speech would) and then pay tribute to her dad in as joyful a way as is possible. Even if he is recently deceased, don’t talk about his death, just talk about how much he loved his daughter and how proud he would have been of her on her wedding day.

Keep any tributes to the end of the speech, so you don’t get choked up too soon. (Although obviously everyone will understand if you do). As much as possible, you want to ensure the speech remains a celebration for a marriage.

If you’re struggling with your emotions, look up. It is said to be physically impossible to cry if you look up.

For more advice on honouring departed family members, please take a look at our Speeches and the Dearly Departed page.

wedidng speech dearly departed

If The Bride's Father Is Absent

If the bride has a difficult relationship with her father, and he isn’t going to be there, today is not a day to bring up your feelings around that. Just simply introduce yourself as the bride’s uncle and leave it at that. No more explanation is necessary.

Uncle of the Bride Speech Structure

All speeches should be unique, and based on you and the bride’s personal relationship (so no Googling for clichéd one liners), but it’s always useful to have a structure to hand as you write it.

  1. Welcome the guests, and make them laugh as quickly as possible. That first ripple of laughter will relax you, and the guests.
  2. Tell some funny anecdotes from the bride’s childhood (especially if it relates to the woman she is now). Remember, a loving tribute includes taking the mick.
  3. Pay tribute to the woman she is now, and how she got there. Pay tribute to the good stuff, the lovely stuff, but most importantly, the funny stuff.
  4. Recount how you met the groom, how you felt about him, and all of the positive things he brings to the bride’s life (and if you really like him, share some of the less positive things too- but only if you can do it with love)
  5. The soppy stuff. You may want to share some advice with the happy couple, or your hopes for them in the future. Let them know that no matter what, you’ll always be there for them.
  6. The toast. Traditionally it’s “to the health and happiness of the happy couple”, but we prefer a more personal touch. Something that means something to them, or which ties into the theme of your speech.
Father of the Bride Speech

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Uncle of the Bride Speech Tips

Rule 1- Be different

Your relationship is different to the traditional father/bride relationship, so why shouldn’t your speech be? Yes, every bride is beautiful, yes every bride is clever and kind, and we’re not saying you shouldn’t include all that stuff, but what makes her unique? What makes your relationship with her unique? She may be wearing a princess dress for the day, but that doesn’t mean that she is one. You love her for who she is, and so does everyone in the room. Celebrate that.

Rule 2- Be funny

People expect the best man to be funny, but no one ever left a wedding thinking “I wish the speeches had been a bit less amusing”.

We all know you were very proud of how well she did in her GCSE’s, but unless there is a funny story attached, save that observation for another time.

We suggest a mix of about 75% humour, with about 25% heartfelt and sincere.

Think of the stories you share with her that still make you laugh out loud. Chances are they’ll make everyone else laugh out loud too.

Rule 3- Tell a story

The best speeches take us on a journey. A theme can be perfect, whether that’s one connected to something she loves, her job, or even the wedding venue, if you can weave some of your anecdotes together you’ll find the speech will land better, it’ll be easier to write, and everyone will think you’re a professional storyteller! (Although be warned- people might start taking bookings)

Rule 4- Less is more

Edit, edit, edit. You’ve known the bride since she was a baby, so there may be so many things you want to say, it could get overwhelming. We suggest you aim for about 7-8 minutes tops (remember you’ll need to add time in there for laughter too- you’ll need it, we promise) About 1100-1200 words should be your absolute upper limit. You can tell everyone all the stories you had to cut at the bar later.

Rule 5- Be prepared to deliver

Will there be a mic? How many people will be in the room? Do you want a full script, or just some notes?

Remember, the wonderful, heartfelt, funny words you have written will need to be spoken out loud at some point, so practice! What looks good on paper can sometimes come out as a tongue twister.

Speak slowly, and don’t forget to smile. Everyone there wants you to do well, so enjoy the moment. The more you enjoy it, the more everyone else will too!

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